Just an FYI...

I am totally not sure how much more work drama I can handle!!!!! I am soooooooo sick of all the crap! More when I have more time...

~K~

A Rant to Start the Week...

Ummm, how much do I loathe being poked with dang needles??? TOO MUCH FOR WORDS!!!! The rheumatologist ordered some super obscure blood tests that the clinic never even heard of, one that they have to order a special tube and call me back in to get, and 1 sharp poke, 1 tingling arm, 1 cramping hand, and $300+ later, we have 8 vials of blood, no answers, and 1 very dizzy Kaitlyn.

NOT my favorite way to start a week, thank you very much!!!

grrrrrr...

~K~

Here's something I thought up the other day. Pray that no one ever reaches number three, most especially me!


My three levels of Writer's Frustration:

1) Writer's Block: A difficulty or halting of the writing process. Overcome by moving on to a different project for a while and coming back to this one later.

2) Writer's Brick Wall: An inability to work on relief project. Frustration and disenchantment with everything to do with the writing process (there are usually tears!) Move on to poetry for relief.

3) Literary Fort Knox: The end of writing as we know it. The end of the world as we know it (thank you REM). A total and complete inability to put words on a page. Complete and total blankness of mind and desolation of spirit. Utter despair.

Poetry from my Frustrated Mind

I write poetry. It helps me vent. It helps me focus. It helps me relax. I write poetry that expresses what I otherwise can't express. I have often told people that I am attempting to write a novel and that when my brain won't let me do that (see writer's block), I write short stories. When I can't write short stories (see Writer's Brick Wall), I write poetry. And when I come upon the literary Fort Knox and can't write poetry, I'm totally and completely useless and can consider the world as we know it to be over.

So here's an example of one of my expressions of frustration in regards to my work. After a particularly frustrating day with a particular large and overbearing client (Kira know's who I'm talking about!!), I wrote this:

Untitled (So far...)

Autism is a world not my own.
I am granted glances in to that world
so foreign and strange
so complex, so beyond my understanding.
The world of Autism is closed to me
but for brief glimpses behind beautiful eyes.
Precious faces
show me a distant land where I am only permitted to visit
"By invitation only."
A rare and short stay.
Minutes, seconds, never more
Before the door closes
and I am forbidden entrance
by that stoic guard of flesh and bone
who hides the person in the world within.
A different sort of person
from you or I.
Living in a body in our world,
but in spirit,
in a world of their own.


I love my job. I couldn't do it if I didn't. But some days are harder than others, for sure. Thank my Lord that I have an outlet like poetry to help me through the bad days. I pray that everyone can find their own outlet to help them through rough and frustrating times.

A Spring Poem

I was sitting at the park yesterday, watching kids run around and just enjoying the fresh air and I was inspired to write a poem. It's one of my happier, upbeat, and family friendly poems so I thought I'd share it. Creative feedback is always welcome. Enjoy!

April Musings

The feeling of Spring drifts
on the air and in the hearts
of all who breathe

The trees, the grass
bloom green, lush

Flowers begin to dot
the ground
in gardens, neat and ordered
in wild, random beauty scattered through
the town

Children laugh and play
with the wild abandon of ones
who know that summer
will soon be upon us

Three months of freedom from
homework, teachers, and classrooms

But for now, anticipation sustains

The sweet air of spring
rushes into stale winter lungs
refreshing all who breathe
Young and old

All feel the fresh, new joy
of Spring.

~K~

Right Now (Thanks Kim, this is great!)

So, I haven't been able to get my Easter stuff posted because Diane fried the computer cord (silly girl), but I have a few free minutes at the library, and this is my version of "Right Now." I got the idea from KKS, thanks hon, you're the bestest!

Right Now...

It's 7:34pm

Diane and I are at the library

The library computers are very slow

Diane has a big stack of books on her lap

I'm thinking about writing a song because of one I heard on the way home from work

I'm thinking about that song ("Hurry Home" by Jason Michael Carrol)

Diane is staring at me and not contributing anything relevant

We both have reliable transportation

We both have jobs

We have enough to eat

We have a roof over our heads

We have each other

One of my friends is in the beginning stages of labor for her 4th child

I'm hungry, it's dinner time

I have a toothache (there's hole issues)

We are not nearly as affected by the war as we could be, thankfully

The sun is going down (it's the first time we've seen it all week!!!)

Gas is $1.97/gallon

Milk is $1.98/gallon

I need to find my scriptures (somehow my largeprint ones got misplaced when we moved and I'm stuck with the small print ones that I can barely read)

I need to be better about reading my scriptures

I need to remember to pray every day

We know that God and our families and friends love us, no matter what



“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” Morrie Schwartz

Conference Weekend

It's been a while since I posted, so, here's an update. Diane started at her new job. She loves it. She ahs a guarantee for a job in the fall, and possibly a job again at DI in the summer. Things are looking up for her. Things are looking up for both of us. I finished up my last week at the Shelter, and though I'll miss the job, I most difinitely won't miss the hours. The graveyard shift was just too much. I need my sleep. I go see the rheumatologist on Monday, cross your fingers, say a prayer, whatever. I need answers, I need to stop being sick all the time. It royally stinks. Can't deal with it anymore. I'm increasing my hours at A&CDC, don't know if that's a good thing or not. hahaha. I have issues with some people there, but I love the work. I think I might be getting burned out with the job, though. It takes a lot out of ya. I'm hoping to go back to school in the fall, but that's kind of laughable, seeing as how I have no money to pay back the other school to get my transcripts for the new school. Lame. I'm darned if I don't and danged if I do. *sigh* I dunno. I feel like I'm at a real standstill in my life. Not movinig forward and in great danger of moving backwards. And I don't know what to do about it. I'm stuck. Suggestions would be greatly helpful...aaaaaanywho, it's Conference weekend, super exciting because we went up to D's parent's house and we're watching on TV, which means I can fiddle around and listen at the same time, which means I get so much more out of it when I can do something with my hands. It's great. Soooo...yeah, almost lunch time which is good cuz I'm starving!!!

~KKH~